"Secrets"

MORNING PRAYER-- O Eternal God, my Savior and Lord, I acknowledge that all I am and all I have is yours. I pray that you will surround me with such a sense of your infinite goodness, that I may return to you all possible love and obedience, through Jesus Christ, Amen.

Psalm 71, Jeremiah 4:9-14, Romans 2:12-24, John 5:19-29

I couldn't post yesterday due to the fact that I have an inner ear infection.... Perfect timing guys, perfect timing. Anyways, the theme that I have heard at least 20 times this week seems to be surrounding worshipping in truth and in Spirit. While I was reading the verses from Romans today, verse 16 made me stop: "This will take place on the day when God judges people's secrets through Jesus Christ, as my gospel declares." I cannot count the amount of times which I have forgotten that God knows all my secrets. He knows them better than I do even. This is a pretty scary thought to me. And after I read this verse, I felt unsettled, but immediately tried to make myself feel better by comparing my secrets to someone else's, you know what I mean, the common "well, at least I'm not like (insert person you're judging here)." Ridiculous! On judgement day, Jesus isn't going to look at me and say, "you do have secrets, but yours aren't as bad as hers... so, you're in!" He is going to judge me and me alone. It's gonna be me and Him.

Another reading that goes along with this is Matthew 27:22-26. This is when Pilate washes his hands clean of Jesus' fate. There is no such thing. Everytime I read this, I think about all the odds that were stacked against Pilate, but they were absolutely nothing compared to those against Jesus Christ, which Pilate only added to. I think about how absurd it is for Pilate to think that he had rid himself of any blame and responsibility by leaving it up to the crowd. But, how many times do I do this? I just did it like 5 minutes ago, so that should give you an idea of how often I participate in this kind of shallow thinking. I've got lots of changing to do!

EVENING PRAYER-- O Lord, "the sacrifice acceptable [to you] is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise . . . You desire truth in the inward being; therefore teach me wisdom in my secret heart." Amen.