Psalm 37, Deuteronomy 7:6-11, Titus 1:1-16, John 1: 29-34
God is so good. Today seems to be all about Thanksgiving to the Lord, and just a total appreciation and awareness of just how Blessed I really am. This morning it seemed like everyone woke up with this same kind of heart. K Love played songs like "Blessed Be The Name of the LORD", "How Great is Our God" and "You Are Everything." People were having so many fun conversations on the way to school this morning and everyone just seemed happy. I probably looked absolutely ridiculous with this huge smile on my face as the feelings of gratefulness were reflected on the faces of random people I didn't even know. It didn't really matter what exactly what they were talking about or doing, just the smiles and the laughter and relationship reminded me of everything Christ has given me.
The steadfastness of His great mercy and love far exceeds anything of my life that I could ever give an example of, or think of period. There is no part of Him that is staind or imperfect in any way, shape, or form, which makes the fact that He would accept me or count me as one of His children even more irrational. Someone who is perfect and untainted, fully accepting (without limitations or bitterness, or even a remembrance of the things I have done in my past) me, who is severly imperfect, tainted, staind, all kinds of things! This does not make sense.... at all. But, it is exactly this kind of nonsense that makes our Father so great. How Great Thou Art!:
"How Great Thou Art"
O Lord my God,
When I in awesome wonder
Consider all
The works Thy Hand hath made,
I see the stars,
I hear the mighty thunder,
Thy pow'r throughout
The universe displayed;
When through the woods
And forest glades I wander
I hear the birds
Sing sweetly in the trees;
When I look down
From lofty mountain grandeur
And hear the brook
And feel the gentle breeze;
Then sings my soul,
My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art!
How great Thou art!
Then sings my soul,
My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art!
How great Thou art!
When Christ shall come,
When Christ shall come,
With shouts of acclamation,
And take me home,
What joy shall fill my heart!
Then I shall bow
In humble adoration
And there proclaim,
"My God, how great Thou art!"
Then sings my soul,
My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art!
How great Thou art!
Then sings my soul,
My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art!
How great Thou art!
I absolutely love this song with all my heart! I especially love to hear it sung by my friend, Brittney Whidden, because its hymns like this that make me think of how praise and worship will sound in heaven. My sister has often described B. Whid's voice as angelic, and I couldn't agree more. This song is perfect, because it showcases every bit of God's glory, while reminding me how much more humble I need to be in order to even be the smallest bit worthy of anything He has given me. And even though I could never deserve anything He has given me, He doesn't keep it from me. He doesn't withold the things He has for me because of my impure heart or because of my pride. The more undeserving I am, the more His mercy exceeds. Amazing love. I feel so blessed that He sees me fit enough to discipline me as He did last night and stop me before I made these 40 days completely about something else other than what He has planned. I felt broken, but humbled, and that is what He calls for. Before last night, I felt sure I knew what it meant to be humbled-- I did not have a friggin clue. But, He is so patient and kind, and broke my heart in a way that no earthly love ever could. It was such a constructive breaking of the heart, in that instead of feeling depressed or hopeless, I felt loved and cherished, and excited for what is next! How strange is that? To be honest, my first reaction to being called out for my pride last night was anger. I was absolutely furious that He would speak through Pastor Chet in that way and call me out in front of the entire congregation-- even though Chet had no clue he was speaking directly about/to me and neither did anyone else in the congregation-- I felt sure everyone knew and they were judging me. So, I had to take one second, get myself together, and I said "I know this is not the right reaction, but I am so mad that You would do this." I told God I was mad at Him......... What?! He should have slapped my face off and sent it flying across the sanctuary, but He gently prodded me to pray and forget about my anger, something I struggle to do everyday. And then He told me that He loves me this way. He loves our broken hearts for Him. Only when our hearts are broken can His love truly reach us to our deepest core. For:
"The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise." (Psalm 51:17)
EVENING PRAYER: "Lord God, you see my heart, and my desires are not hidden from you. To you, O God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, my Creator, Redeemer, and Sanctifier, I give up myself entirely. May I no longer serve myself, but you alone. Amen."
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